wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
