Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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