I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
