honey bunches of taint.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize