bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
