is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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