I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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