There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
