I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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