Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
