i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
