He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize