We should be called the Road Head Warriors
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Randomize
