then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
