there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize