Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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