Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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