i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
