Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize