I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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