i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize