and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
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