yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
