I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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