no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
