I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
