He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
