Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
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