cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
