you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
