i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
i think im in europe. pls send help
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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