5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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