i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
