i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
My pussy is not your playground.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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