It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
