There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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