big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
My ATM looks so different sober.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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