I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I just gift wrapped bread.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
