I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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