After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
He kissed a someone with a penis
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
