The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
