Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
