Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
