Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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