More tranny stories later!
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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