Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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