I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize