Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
