I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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