Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
